New year, new goals

I cannot believe another year has gone by. 2016 has seemed to be a strange,  dysfunctional year for many people, including myself. Personally, I think I started the year confused, insecure, and as somebody who was just not me. I ended 2016 knowing so much more about myself, and enjoying my life much more than I did in the beginning.

Everyone was talking about creating new years resolutions before the ball  dropped to begin 2017. I think that creating new years resloutions is great, but not if those are the only goals you set the whole year, because in that case you won’t get very far.

I truly believe that what led to my 2016 ending with joy and 2017 starting on a high note, was that I set goals for myself throughout the year. I picked out a big goal, and each and every day I would assign myself small goals that would eventually lead me to a bigger achievment. I had very broad goals throughout the year;  I wanted to find myself, I wanted to be more thankful for what I have, I wanted to spend more time with my family, get good grades, etc. I knew that I couldn’t simply state that these were my goals, and then expect to acheive them. I had to work hard on myself. I had to remind myself daily of what I wanted to achieve. I learned that in order to get to those big goals, I had to remember them and take steps toward them every single day.

I started 2016 not knowing who I was at all, so I tried to brainstorm what I could do to get to know myself better. For example, dance classes were taking over my whole life. I had loved to dance in the past, but something was changing. I realized it was bothering me that I rarely had time with my family. Also, having so many dance classes made me very stressed out about school because I was too busy to study. Also, I had not tried a new activity in a long time, and I was more than ready to expand my horizons. In addition, I even found myself not enjoying dance as much because everything seemed out of balance. I decided to cut  way down on dance classes (from ten classes to just one!). I thought that doing this would help me to achieve several of my goals; finding more aspects of myself (exploring new interests), spending time with my family, and getting good grades. 

I also started this blog, which was something I really needed to do because I love to write, but I stopped writing for years because I had no time. My blog is helping me to discover thoughts of mine I didn’t exactly know I had. 

I started to read more, which is another interest of mine I wanted to add back into my life. I was also able to spend quality time with my family each night, and I was able to succeed in school while being less stressed. I have also been able to get involved in community service with my friends, which I am really loving!

My goal, or “new years resolution”, to begin 2017 is to just be a nicer person by going out of my way more often to help others, and to do things to make my own self happy. Once again, in order to acheive this I have to create daily goals to get me there. This year, I will always try to do “the nicer thing” in all situations, and I will try to perform acts of kindness just to put a smile on someone’s face. 

In addition to this, I will just continue to look for parts of myself that I may have forgotten and make other goals throughout the year to get me into the happiest state possible.

So, I think it’s great to make a goal to start the year, but I think it’s even better to be setting goals all the time. Try not to limit your goal-setting just to January 1st. I hope everyone had a great new year and holiday season. I also hope that 2017 will be an amazing year for everyone full of love and blessings and achievements. Allow yourself to learn and grow this year.

Love,

Jillian

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My Papa Nelson, my inspiration.

Flaws Are Beautiful

I think that we can all agree that middle school is an awkward time in most peoples’ lives. We are all changing mentally and physically, and we are attempting to find our true selves. We may not yet know exactly where we belong or exactly why we were put on this planet. We are trying to find our real friends and our real interests. I, for one, am confused, lost, sad sometimes, happy other times, but mostly I am just trying to find my way down this really rocky path called teenage hood. 

I think one of the biggest problems in our generation is that we all hide our problems from one another. We want people to think that we have this perfect life with no flaws, and even during a difficult time like middle school, we pretend that we are totally fine, and that nothing feels weird or awkward. We post pictures on social media that show our perfect selves living our perfect lives. Something about this has felt really wrong to me. I have found that by hiding our flaws, we are making each other feel even worse about ourselves. This is because when we feel sad or lost, we believe that we are alone. We think that we are the only people that experience these feelings, but in reality, everyone does! We are all just doing a great job of faking it. We all say to ourselves, “Oh my gosh, look at them, look at their pictures, they have perfect lives” But, here’s the secret– no one does! We all just try to hide the flaws in our lives, but do you know what? The flaws are what help people connect and bond with each other! Knowing someone’s flaws can stop you from envying that person and you can start to see them in a more real way. I have experienced “hating” people because they seem so perfect, but I have learned that nobody is perfect; we all just feel the need to portray ourselves in that manner.

In addition, I believe that knowing someones’ flaws helps me to develop more respect for them. For example, when I truly admire a celebrity, and then read an article on a struggle they have experienced throughout their life, I automatically think, “Wow, their life isn’t perfect, and they’re not hiding their flaws like other people do. How cool!” In movies and books, I gain respect for characters because you see all angles of their lives; the good and the bad. We should be able to share all elements of our lives with each other, and we should not be ashamed of the flaws in our lives because we need to learn that flaws are included in everyones’ life no matter how perfect they may seem.

To conclude, do you want to change how you want to portray  your life? Are you ready to share parts of yourself that are the real parts, parts that you’ve hidden to keep your perfect self showing? This is how I started: I opened up to my friends about my insecurities, life problems, and things that aren’t neccesarily my favorite aspects of my life. Then, guess what??? They did the same!  And it has truly strengthened our friendships. I encourage you to not try as hard to fake a perfect life, and to accept the fact that nobody’s life is perfect. 

So, share a flaw with a friend! Try it and see what happens. They may share one with you. When I started to do this, my whole outlook regarding myself and others changed forever. We all became more real. 

Good Luck!

Love, Jillian

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New Beginnings

“Everybody dies, but not everybody lives..” 

-William Wallace

 

My name is Jillian and throughout my entire life I have felt like I’ve had so much to share with the world. Every day I learn new things about myself and about life, and I’m ready to share my growth with others. In addition, I have loved writing my whole life, but less important things have gotten in the way of my writing which is pretty much all technology. When I’m bored, I go on my phone. When I have an hour to spare, I watch Netflix.

 
I’m done with this routine, and I’m ready to live. For real.

 
I’m ready to go back to my natural interests: reading, writing, and being passionate about certain topics. Over the years, these interests have been undermined, and I’m ready to start being me again.

 
Not many people my age write blogs, and to be honest I was scared about what people would think. But there’s a new philosophy I’m trying out: I am not going to care about what others think of me.

 
Because I cared so much about the thoughts of others, I lost my true self. I’m sick of following the trends, having to post the right things on social media, always wasting time scrolling through Instagram and snap chatting my friends, and dismissing the things that I used to love. The things, that I still love, but I never do anymore because little things like my phone and the expectations of others have taken over my life, and more importantly, they have taken away my true self.

 
Well, here we go. I’m going to write. I’m going to share my thoughts that I’m very passionate about. I’m going to limit my use of meaningless social media. I’m going to find my true self. I look forward to meeting her, and I look forward for others to meet her as well.

 
Welcome to my blog.

Love,

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